feeling blue

(all images by Kate Kennington Steer) I put on some music, trying to catch a mood, but the invented rhythms do nothing. So I listen instead to the cackle and spit of the fire, the roar and hiss of the rain, the howl and whip of the wind and ah, yes, there it is. ‘MoodContinue reading “feeling blue”

day 14

If grief can be a doorway to love, then let us all weep for the world we are breaking apart so we can love it back to wholeness again.” Robin Wall Kimmerer So often when I feel utterly joyless, and completely weighed down by the weight of my own pain and the weight of the suffering thatContinue reading “day 14”

feeling vulnerable: Blue Christmas 2019

The following was written for the Godspace blog, as part of their Advent series on ‘Who is this child?’ visual journalling page from Kate Kennington Steer   I was unable to have children of my own, so holding my nephews, niece and friends’ children over the years has been such a precious bittersweet joy.  AsContinue reading “feeling vulnerable: Blue Christmas 2019”

advent apertures 2019: Blue Christmas

Evening says to night: “Are you always this beautiful under your clothes?” Night says to the moon: “All day I dreamed of you but I couldn’t bring myself to call.” The moon says to sleep: “There are doorways in the dark.” Sleep says to dawn: “As if forward were the only direction!” Dawn says toContinue reading “advent apertures 2019: Blue Christmas”

advent apertures 2019: day 13

What little I know, I hold closer, more dear, especially now that I take the daily reinvention of loss as my teacher. I will never graduate from this college, whose M.A. translates “Master of Absence,” with a subtext in the imperative: Misplace Anything. If there’s anything I want, it’s that more people I love joinContinue reading “advent apertures 2019: day 13”

advent apertures 2019: day 12

Not the profound dark night of the soul   and not the austere desert to scorch the heart at noon, grip the mind in teeth of ice at evening   but gray, a place without clear outlines,   the air heavy and thick   the soft ground, clogging my feet if I walk, sucking themContinue reading “advent apertures 2019: day 12”

advent apertures 2019 day 9

… with our faces so close to the love mirror, we must not breathe, but rather change to a cleared place where a building was and feel the treasure hiding in us … from ‘A story they know’ Rumi (translated by Coleman Barks)   How would I feel if on this everyday Monday morning anContinue reading “advent apertures 2019 day 9”